Is Talking to Yourself the Key to Business Success?
And no, I’m not just going crazy
Life in the 21st century is a complicated business. It’s also busy, busy, busy. When you are not sleeping, eating, or earning a living, you must, simultaneously, manage an incredibly wide range of activities and relationships.
We spend our lives caring for children, spending time with family and friends, staying physically fit, paying bills, managing finances, dealing with technology, arranging insurance, shopping, preparing meals, doing laundry, cleaning, looking after our home, keeping up with the news—and the beat goes on, and on...
Our routines are relentless and cyclical. Just listing these must-dos is exhausting, and we have yet to factor in the emotional drain we go through when parts of life unexpectedly derail. Car accidents, medical emergencies, picking up the pieces when you’ve neglected important relationships, and the like.
Given the multitude of tasks and responsibilities we face daily, it's no surprise that many of us feel overwhelmed and stressed. Managing life's demands can seem like a never-ending juggling act. So how do you avoid unnecessary problems and keep life running smoothly? The key is to set up a system to identify and address issues before they escalate. This involves dedicating time for personal reflection and analysis to stay ahead of potential challenges.
How often have you said to yourself, “If only I had dealt with this earlier, that hassle could have been avoided.”
This article describes a system my wife and I have used successfully for the past five years. I got the idea from the president of the first publishing company I worked for. Every Thursday afternoon, he would close his office door after lunch. He never booked meetings on these afternoons—not with his management team, and not with outsiders.No one knew what was going on in the boss’s office behind closed doors, but there was much speculation. The most salacious employees were convinced he was having it off with one of the company’s authors. According to office rumors, an extremely attractive university professor sneaked into his office over the lunch hour. Others suggested that he was simply taking an afternoon nap..
During one of my weekly face-to-face meetings with the boss, he gave me the real scoop. He spent the time analyzing all the business-related data and intelligence that had come to his attention that week.
This phenomenally successful corporate executive felt that most business managers get into needless trouble, and miss great opportunities, because too much of their time is devoted to meetings and one-to-one discussions with other people − while too little time is allocated to personal reflection and analysis.
Upon learning this secret, I immediately incorporated it into my weekly routine, with one difference. Rather than locking myself up on Thursday afternoons I favored Friday mornings.
These closed-door sessions were highly productive. I often identified new opportunities that would otherwise have passed me by, and worked out problems before they ballooned into costly mistakes.
After selling my businesses, I adapted this strategy to manage my personal life, except that instead of spending this time on my own, I asked my wife, Babs, to join me. Every Saturday morning, Babs makes a fresh pot of coffee while I walk to the bakery down the street and pick up two piping hot croissants fresh from the oven. Then, we hunker down for our weekly assessment of what has happened over the past week in all aspects of our life.
We never rush this Saturday morning ritual. We always start by assessing our relationships with friends and family, and our relationship with each other. Then we move on to practical matters like the state of our finances and home maintenance. We end each session by discussing our upcoming social calendar, including planned holidays.
Our Saturday morning ritual is amazingly productive. About a year ago, while discussing our relationships with friends and family, we both felt these relationships were drifting off track. In talking about this we realized that, instead of talking by phone or meeting in person, the bulk of our interactions were now taking place through social media, where no spontaneous interaction is possible and it’s hard to convey the context of what is taking place in our lives. With this realization, we cut back on the use of social media and started making phone calls and setting up regular Zoom meetings. Within a month or so of making these changes, our relationships became fuller and richer. This would never have happened had we not aired this problem and talked through it at a Saturday morning session. As an added bonus, we reviewed all the streaming services we were paying for and realized some were no longer being used. By canceling these subscriptions, we saved over $100 per month.
For us, the Saturday morning sessions have been a spectacular success. But one unexpected benefit outshines all else. By going through this process as a team, our relationship has blossomed to new heights.
If this article has motivated you to adopt a similar program to keep your life on track, here is what to do.
Read and discuss this article with your spouse or life partner.
If you both agree to adopt this strategy, set a regular time each week when your meeting will take place. For best results, make this an important ritual that’s built into your life.
Agree on the topic checklist you will work through at each meeting. These topics will change as you move through each stage of life.
Use The Pathfinder’s monthly Life Audit to get some inspiration on topics to cover.
Ron Hume
Spreading the Word
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We want to make The Pathfinder a community where members exchange ideas. If you want to share your story on The Pathfinder or suggest a topic for an article, please get in touch with Ron at ron.hume@rogers.com.
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